Military Sayings, Part I

Over the course of my career contracting with the US Military, I have come across several phrases, sayings and euphanisms that can only be understood by those who have served in the military, or have at some point in their life, been a military dependent. These phrases have many different origins and meaning of varying hilarity, and I wanted to share some of them with you.

1. "Keep your head down"- Keep your head down is what you say to someone who is going into a active war zone. It's sort of like saying "break a leg" instead of "good luck" to someone who is starring in a play, at least from what I can surmise. When I was here in 2004, everyone kept telling me to keep my head down, which terrified me. Was it neccesary to keep my head down at all times? Was I in imminent danger of getting shot in the head? I think I literally kept my head down for the first month until I realized that it was just a saying.

2. "Rack Out"- To "Rack Out" means to fall asleep. Your "Rack" is your bed, and to "rack out" I guess means to fall asleep on your "rack." I guess that isn't that funny, but still, it's not something you here in normal conversation, thus its inclusion in this list.

3. "Hit" the "Head"- To hit the head means to go to the bathroom. But apparently, only for males. In 2005 when I was working for the Air Force Space Command Center, I said I was going to "hit" the "head" and everyone on my crew laughed at me. I didnt get it, until my LT said "And how do you suppose you are going to do that?" I was just trying to be cool like them! Now, I ask the meaning before I use any military saying.

4. "Weapon" and "Gun"- Apparently, soldiers carry weapons. They do not carry guns. Your "weapon" is the thing you fire at your enemy to kill them. Your "gun" on the other hand... well, you can figure it out. Think Full Metal Jacket. (this is my rifle, this is my gun, this is for fighting, this is for fun). So, basically, there are few very occasions, ladies, where you would ask a soldier to see his gun. His weapon, on the other hand, he would probably be happy to show you. Well, he would probably be happy to show you his gun too... anyway, I digress.

5. "See a Man About a Dog"- My friend Tim, who works with me, told me that going to "see a man about a dog" meant you were going to go poop. However, I told my friend Paul later that evening that Tim "went to go see a man about a dog", and Paul looked at me with a big shit-eating grin. Then he told me what it REALLY means. It doesn't have ANYTHING to do with pooping at all! While I don't think it neccesary to regale you with the tale of what it really means, let me instead just warn you to never, ever tell a soldier you are going to see a man about a dog.

6. "Devil Dogs"- Devil Dogs are what they call Marines. "Salty Dogs" are Marines that have seen combat, or older Marines. I don't know if that's worthy of the list or not, but I like it, so I included it.

7. "Say Again" and "Repeat"- I never understood why over the phone, soldiers always say "say again" when they want you to repeat something. Well, apparently, the only time you say "Repeat" is when you want to repeat an attack or fire. So if you simply want someone to say something again, you say "Say Again". Why the hell does the military have to make things so complicated? Why can't they just say "Fire Again" and "Repeat That" for talking. My brain is spinning now.

8. DFAC, "Chow", "Rats"- all mean food. I know, totally uneccesary. Mainly I put this in here so when I come home and I am like "Hey, let's go get some chow" or "Hey, it's time for midrats" you will understand what I am saying.

9. "Mother's Day"- According to Paul, mother's day is the 1st and 15th of every month. You pay this mother, and that mother, and that mother..... and so on and so forth

10. CHU, Can Or Hooch- You have heard me say this many times. CHU stands for Combat Housing Unit. Really what it means is "Shipping Container made to look like a trailer." That is why some people call it their "can". I am not sure where "hooch" comes from.

11. FOB- FOB stands for Forward Operating Base. For instance, where I work, JBB, is a FOB. Victory Base Camp in Baghdad is a FOB. Ali Al Salem is a FOB. You get the idea. You can also say "post" or "camp" or "base"

12. "Fobbit" or "Pogue". A Fobbit is someone who stays "inside the wire" at all times. Meaning, they stay on the base the whole time. I am a fobbit. My co workers are fobbits. Special Forces? Not fobbits. No one wants to admit they are a fobbit, but it's not that big of a deal. This is not 'Nam, folks. 'pogues' is what they used to call fobbits in Viet Nam.

13. "Click" - One click is equal to one kilometer. When I first got here in 2004, a nice solider named Aaron told me that the DFAC was "about half a click that way <------" I remember thinking to myself "THIS IS AWESOME! It's like being in the movie Platoon or something." Sadly, no one says click anymore. I guess it kind of faded away or is replaced with some new terminology that I don't know about yet.

14. MRE- Or, as Paul likes to call them "Meals Ready to Regurgitate". Meals Ready to Eat are slightly preferable to eating dirt or bugs. I think the idea behind them is that they have a ton of calories so soliders in the field can be sustained off them for long periods of time. The ONLY good MRE is the cheese ravioli, and even that's questionable. Sometimes they have brownies or cookies in them, or cinammon flavored apples, but most of the time, they are just vile. The only fun thing about them is the MRE heater, which is some kind of chemical reaction in a bag used to heat up your food. I have many, many MRE heater explosion stories. Perhaps another day.

15. Haji- A Haji is an Iraqi national usually selling bazaar type items somewhere on the FOB. Beware when using this term, it's actually quite offensive to Muslims, as a "haji" is someone making their haaj, the once in a lifetime journey to Mecca and Medina that all Muslims make. I'll cover this a little more in my upcoming article about the Middle East and its Inhabitants.

These are just the ones I can think of right now. Ill periodically update this with more sayings. I hear them every day and they just astound me. I am like "what the hell is a DOIM? What is that? I have no idea what you just said! WHAT IS WITH ALL THE ACRONYMS!"


Update: Email from Bernard:
Just so you know, the term Devil Dogs was the name given the Marines by the Germans during WWI, and Hooch is from the Nam era referring to a thatched hut..basically where they slept when they could......thought I'd give you a little info you may not have had...stupid useless info stuck in my head...lol!

Until next week...